Thursday, April 3, 2008

I don't remember

I don't remember being in ninety percent of the pictures that have been taken of me. I don't remember who was behind the camera, what they were wearing, what they were saying, or what we were doing to afford a picture of the moment. I can often guess what was going on by what I'm wearing or what's in the background, but I still don't remember. I don't remember what I worried about when I was in sixth grade. I don't remember my brother or my sister as toddlers. To me, they've always been the way they are right now, today. Now that I think about it, it feels like I haven't changed either. I suppose everyone feels (to a certain extent) that they are the same person despite what others perceive or observe.
I don't remember very much of junior high. Those were two of the worst and best years of my education. I don't remember all of my teachers very clearly. It seems that the teachers who were the best or most passionate about teaching are the ones I remember most clearly. I know, that isn't really a new concept or facet of human nature, but sometimes, I do forget.
I hardly remember my graduation. It's all a blur now. In the end, I know some of those memories will resurface, but I prefer to focus on memories that I know will always return fully. The weather helps me remember. When a new season arrives, I feel like I forget about the one that just passed every single time. I end up forgetting what brisk cold feels like just as heavily as I forget the sensation of warmth. My body always remembers. I don't know if that's something I've realized before, because my mind doesn't seem to recall.

1 comment:

Eytan Ben-Yeoshua said...

It's interesting that you decided to focus on aspects of your education. In addition to this, you commented on family. These seem to be two major part of our lives at this age. Keeping this in mind, it is difficult to believe that there is so much that we don't remember or at least don't remember well. You are right in saying that we tend to focus on the things we do remember, and as a result, our grasp on distant memories continually weakens.